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RD's avatar

Could you point me in the right direction on things to read regarding teenagers not eating (she has about 3-4 things she will eat. She doesn't know why or cannot explain it). We have seen a doctor and are waiting to hear back from CAHMS, etc.

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Lorraine Candy's avatar

In my book about teen girls - which is part memoir and part interviews with experts - one of the things I learnt was the idea of not trying to 'fix' our teens. https://www.waterstones.com/book/mum-whats-wrong-with-you/lorraine-candy/9780008407216

That perhaps we allow them to develop at their own pace and we sit with some of the challenges that arise, as their brain undergoes huge changes during this time. I don't know exactly how your daughter's eating habits affect her mental or physical health so cannot be more specific but can perhaps reassure you that this is not uncommon, we get asked about it a lot on our private Facebook group. I certainly went through a white food only phase with my own teens which worried me (and none of the foods could touch each other on the plate!) but the eldest now 20 eats a really healthy diet, she once existed almost entirely on plain pasta and butter! I spoke to nutritionist Sam Perkins of https://happyeaters.co.uk/ for the podcast on how to get more variety in, her advice was also to accept this does happen during teenage. It may be a sign of other issues and perhaps Dr Tara Porter's book for teen girls would help your daughter https://www.amazon.co.uk/You-Dont-Understand-Me-bestseller/dp/1788705122. Good luck with your family.

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RD's avatar

Thank you so much. I will have a read and a listen. I love you both on the podcast.

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Lorraine Candy's avatar

A follower here left a message which has since been deleted, it was about relationships and I do have some advice from an expert for you that may be helpful. You can direct message me on Instagram perhaps or join our private Facebook group where we do discuss intimate details in safety and our experts can help from the podcast - join here https://www.facebook.com/groups/681448662400206/about/

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Tina McGuff's avatar

Hi Lorraine - I would love to hear more conversations around step/blended families and how parents manged those often complex emotional issues. Thank you. Tina

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Lorraine Candy's avatar

I find Dr Lisa Damour's work on parenting and those she collaborates with super useful, this podcast helped a friend of mine too. https://drlisadamour.com/how-should-step-parents-fit-in/

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Clare Lamont's avatar

Lisa Damours books are like manuals for parenting tweens/teens. (Not just girls either). My well thumbed, annotated and post-it littered copies sit next to my bed. Lorraine have you interviewed her for the podcast?

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Tina McGuff's avatar

Thank you very much

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Liz's avatar

Hi Lorraine, what's your advice for getting yourself ready for the next senior role. It will be an external move, so what should I be thinking and doing to get me ready in 12-18 months time?

Thank you!

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Lorraine Candy's avatar

Congrats on thinking that far ahead! I would say 2 things, having managed many teams and worked with a coach myself. 1) Dont let planning that far ahead close your mind to other less obvious opportunities that may occur, careers are not always linear and sideways moves may present themselves that are more fun, fulfilling etc I am always wary of planning careers, my moves have been quite unexpected. 2) Perhaps start a project you own in your current role with defined goals that you could present as proof of your unique worth to the next senior role, this is always useful when potential employers ask what you have done in the last year which was a success. You have a start to finish project, not matter how small, that you own. We interviewed the career coach Rachel Schofield on our podcast about ambition and planning too FYI https://www.rachelschofield.co.uk/about

Have a look through our archive: https://play.acast.com/s/postcardsfrommidlife

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